Blog #596 Valentine’s Day

Ah Valentine’s Day!!    Today and tomorrow I’m going to be looking at Valentine’s day

Like so many other days, it has become commercialized.  Guys, you are expected to buy flowers, candy, a sentimental card, and take your girl out to dinner (and … not to a fast food place).  Girls, you are expecting the flowers and other treatment. (And, if you don’t get them, it is like an unexpected loss and some take it hard.)

Did you know? Approximately 150 million Valentine’s Day cards are exchanged annually, making Valentine’s Day the second most popular card-sending holiday after Christmas.

But, what is it?  Sure it comes from Saint Valentine.  One legend (you can check the link for more legends), that the Roman Emperor thought that single men were better soldiers, so forbade marriage.  Valentine secretly performed weddings, contrary to the Emperor’s decree, and ultimately was killed.

But, let me go off in a different direction today.  Marriage (and divorce).

Marriage is a legal (often religious) activity united a man and a woman (and, if you will, men to men, women to women, etc in today’s society).  

Ah, yes, LOVE!!!  The birds are singing, flowers are blooming, and lovers are swooning in each other’s arms.  Life is so wonderful, so fantastic.

But, like other things in life, things change – children come along, financial difficulties occur, jobs change, the economy changes, health conditions change and the partners can slowly drift apart.  Hey – life happens.

Soon, there are the spats, the disagreements, the fights, and the talks of divorce.  Angry words are said, like “I never really loved you” (ouch). Things go downhill fast.

So, I want to highlight “!0 ways to stay in Love by America’s Hottest Husbands” (from Redbook Magazine).  (I was a little disappointed that I didn’t make the list of 10 Hottest Husbands!! <smile>)

-1 Give them your TIME.  I have heard the concept that love is spelled “T I M E”.  Spend quality time with them. Keep a standard “Date Night”, find off-beat ways to spend time together (the article suggested bowling, volunteering at a soup kitchen, and taking a painting class together).

-2 Don’t be afraid of growth.  The article suggests it is easy to get in a rut.  Spice it up, get out of the rut (hey bowling, volunteering at a soup kitchen and painting would be out of our rut)>

-3 “Be In It to Win It”.  I’ve written about attitude a lot.  You have to have an attitude that you and your partner are going to make it.  One year, ten years, fifty years – ‘until death parts you’.

-4 Up your small gesture game.  Make her/his/their life easier, make the coffee in the morning (without being asked), take out the trash (without being asked), do the laundry (without being asked), watch the kids (without being asked)!!!

-5 Look at your spouse through somebody else’s eyes.  How does your partner’s boss look at that person? Do they admire his or her work?  Is she recognized for that? How do the neighbors look at him or her – a good neighbor that keeps your property neat and yard trimmed?

Tomorrow we’ll look at the rest of the list.  

BUT – as tomorrow IS Valentine’s Day – how are you and your spouse going to approach it?  Just another day, or a day to celebrate your unity, your love and your commitment?

Think about it!!

See you tomorrow!!


Posted by Bruce White

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